Elena Harap |
ANCESTORS AND ELEVATORS: Reflections on Class, Identity, and Public Spaces
By Elena Harap
Hospital corridors: long, shiny, and impersonal. I
passed through them each afternoon during my husband’s
week of recovery from surgery for a knee
replacement. The operation succeeded and
he soon came home to our Boston apartment, walked freely, climbed stairs
without pain, took hikes in the Arboretum. As I write I am not even sure I
remember which knee is the one with the scar.
Nonetheless,
I experience a certain melancholy when I recall the hospital’s
faceless corridors and quietly metallic elevators, empty of traffic at the end
of the work day. The surroundings were politely intimidating, lacking in
texture, although I respected the labor evidenced by meticulously clean
bathrooms, freshly mopped floors. Billboard-like posters along the walls remind
me how caring and humane (smiling patients were quoted) was this place. Plaques
and signs named benefactors, who became
my companions on trips to and fro.
Most
prominent were Florence
and Mortimer Gryzmysh: I
was fascinated by the consonants. Following sign after repetitive sign on the
way to their building, resisting my sense of outsider-ness, I invented a story
of penniless immigrants who built a fortune, donating millions to raise this
tower. I became suspicious of my imagined entrepreneurs. Was theirs ill-gotten
wealth? Finally I consulted the Internet, where I found the report of a gift
from this family, some fifty years ago, of half a million toward the
development of the hospital complex. I felt vaguely disappointed. $500,000––a
formidable sum, but the donors didn’t appear to be multimillionaires. Besides,
they were native Bostonians, and I had incorrectly copied the name, which
should have read Gryzmish. So much for my story; still, it had brought a
human face to the imposing names on the wall.
I
took note of other honored families:
Leon V. and Marilyn L. Rosenberg;
John and Rosalie Frank. Maybe their descendants would find a
welcome in the familiar names. The title over the entrance to the Clinical
Cancer Center would evoke someone’s genial, joke-telling grandfather or
outspoken, activist grandmother. Even elevator cars bore plaques above the
doors. On the way to some upper floor the visiting relative might recognize the name of an austere uncle,
a beautiful and stylish great-aunt, and feel a sense of belonging.
And
so—why
not?—I
began to insert my own family’s names. How about the Moses
and Yetta Harap Cancer Center, for the grandparents whom I knew only
from a turn-of-the-twentieth-century family photo, whose legacy of children
included my father and some of my favorite uncles and aunts? Yetta had died of
Hodgkins Disease, an immigrant woman still raising her family of nine
children. Her husband, a New York
factory worker, clung to an Orthodox isolation, but his kids, secular
Americans, roamed into worlds of business, scholarship, farming—and
the next generations explored medicine, fashion, politics. Maybe if Yetta had
lived into her seventies I could have known her; maybe at this moment someone
else’s
grandmother was being healed in Yetta’s Cancer Center. She too might
contribute to the cultural galaxy of an urban hospital.
For
my mother’s side, I would endow the Norah
and William Chater Interfaith Chapel.
English and Episcopalian, these grandparents numbered priests among their
descendants. The visitor could sit quietly in their space. I would mourn there
for William himself, a journalist whose death by drowning, a possible suicide,
left his wife to raise four children, teaching piano and taking in boarders at
their row house in Brooklyn. Norah would bring to the chapel the music she
loved.
As
for the elevators, I transformed plaques over the doors and rode up to my
husband’s
ward in the company of Eugene and Edith Frankel, Connecticut
cousins who used to visit and tell stories from family history. Coming down, I
might dedicate the compartment to my own parents, Joan Chater and Henry
Harap. This strategy amused but also sustained me, a comforting way of entering and owning the
hospital culture. You, the reader, might try it next time you walk through a
high-ceilinged hospital entrance hall feeling adrift and anonymous. But this is
hardly the kind of suggestion one would find posted at the door.
Suppose
healing is connected with identity; suppose that as a house of healing, the
hospital must somehow represent all of us––donors, financiers, architects,
builders, laborers; medical, administrative, and maintenance workers; students and researchers; patients, their
parents, grandparents, children, siblings, extended families and friends––assuring
each an equal stake in this institution. An inspired painting or tapestry in
the lobby might affirm the worlds within worlds of all who come and go. Each
one’s
story would occupy space, in the current moment and in the mirror of time. It
seems unlikely.
Instead,
for short-term consumers like my husband and myself, revolving through massive
doors into the labyrinth of a large hospital, I envision a simple technology. We could dedicate our own
elevators, at least for the duration of our ride. Elevator cars would be
equipped with a keyboard on which we could enter the name of an ancestor, a
living relative, or a friend. The name would then appear over the door as if on
a plaque. No neon, nothing glitzy, just
clear black letters on a neutral background—THE Reverend
Walter Chater: my minister uncle
who sought to help post-World War II refugees;
Lynda Patton, a sister by mutual adoption, a
questioner, dispeller of prejudice right up to her death in her early sixties.
You, reader, will add your chosen names. If we’re in the elevator
at the same time, our electronic gadget will accommodate numerous plaques
around the wall of the compartment, watching over us, lifting our spirits.
Having seen us safely to our floors, the names erase; the space is open for the next passenger’s
honoree.
I’m
almost ready to believe my invention will work when I start to worry about its
misuse. TV characters, political candidates, or villains of history might be
made appear on the walls. How to protect the concept of a perpetual wall of
respect: an honor roll that constantly recreates itself? The technology of
inclusion might provide wall screens like those in airports, where a flurry of
confetti-like fragments creates a personal silhouette as we walk by, then
resolves again into a blur, ready for the next imprint. Or another approach: ancestors’ names would light up under visitors’ feet, sent from myriad hospital rooms
to adorn the floor of the main lobby.
One way or another, we’re
all stuck with the risky business of birth, death, and everything in between;
we come to a hospital in trouble, needing help. As I walked the corridors and
played with fantasies of naming, I was attempting to tap into a source of
resilience. I wanted to bring my fullest
reserve of humor and wellness to my husband’s room on the orthopedic floor.
Borrowing the impulse of those who named the buildings and other structures, I
elevated those closest to me, giving them a public presence and invoking their
benevolence.
Now,
living in the small state of Vermont, I enter the carpeted halls of the
three-story building that houses my local hospital, not as a stranger. I’m acquainted with the artist whose
painting hangs in the lobby; I recognize the retired surgeon who sits reading a
newspaper in the coffee shop; I am at ease within the architectural scale. I
know this place, and it knows me. This is the healthy reciprocity that should
be available to everybody, not only in hospitals but in public spaces
generally. If we find it we are nurtured; if not, we have to create it for
ourselves. Remember we’re around, say the ancestors, in case you
need us in the elevators.
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er poems and essays have appeared in Sojourner, Bayou, Jewish Currents, Summer Home Review, and on NPR. She tours nationally in "Meet Eleanor Roosevelt," a one-woman show written and produced with Josephine Lane
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Elena
Harap, descended from English Protestant and East European Jewish
immigrants, grew up in Nashville, TN. She earned her
B.A.,
Wellesley
College;
M. A.,
Boston University; MFA
in Writing,
VT
College of Fine Arts. She has worked privately with Kathleen Spivack.
At the Joiner Institute, UMass/Boston, Elena studied with
Martín
Espada, Martha Collins, Fred
Marchant, Charles Dumas, Danielle Legos Georges, and Lady Borton.
er poems and essays have appeared in Sojourner, Bayou, Jewish Currents, Summer Home Review, and on NPR. She tours nationally in "Meet Eleanor Roosevelt," a one-woman show written and produced with Josephine Lane
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